What Critics Are Saying About the Fire!

Second City’s Chicago offices suffered a devastating fire last week, but thanks to the heroic work of the Chicago Fire Department, much destruction was avoided. However, there’s nothing people like more than a) disaster and b) their own opinions, and we’ve known for many decades, everyone’s a critic. The flames weren’t even out before The Piper’s Alley Fire of 2015 racked up quite a few reviews. Here are some of our favorites.

"Simply not funny. Just an FYI, the blaze was simply dreadful, and I only found 1 out of MANY sparks amusing. Come early, or good luck finding a good view! The water was ok, but there was no intermission and it just kept dragging on and on. If you’re super conservative/easily offended, I’m not sure you’d enjoy this. I’ve been to fires in Schaumburg and they were way better. One star." —Maureen Johnson, Oak Lawn, IL

"Could’ve been worse.” —Mrs. O’Leary

"The true test of a good fire is longevity. How long does it burn; how long do the remnants stick on the fingers; how many children does it send to the hospital before it’s removed from school vending machines? I wasn’t impressed." —Flamin' Hot Cheetos

"We didn’t start it." —B-Jo, A-Schu ’n J-Law

"I’d fight it." —Another Fire

"***** This Family Burns Deep.”—NBC’s Chicago Fire

"Super inconvenient. Really put a crimp in my Wednesday plans. Had to push back my mani/pedi by AN HOUR. Really inconsiderate, would’ve liked some notice. —Lincoln Park Cunt

"Overall, pretty solid. I thought it was weird, though, in the second half how one of firefighters was replaced and it was NEVER  acknowledged AT ALL. #SecondCityFamilyMatters" --That Winslow Daughter

"Shorter than I expected?" —First-Century Rome

"********************...1,989 Stars
I often think back to the first day I saw it. You know, I think about it when I’m in the grocery store, and it crosses my mind a bit, like, when I got to a soccer game and 60,000 people boo me. And I think, if I had to do it all over again, what would I have done? You know this place tomorrow, it’s gonna be a completely different set up. The stage will be gone. But the effect that it had on people will remain. You know how many times they ran that footage again? Because it got them more ratings. I don’t understand how they get people who worked their entire lives to be considered losers! I don’t understand it, bruh! And the art ain’t always gonna be polite. Ya’ll might be thinking right now, 'did he smoke something before he came out here?' And the answer is yes, I knocked the edge off." —Kanye West, confessing to starting the fire

Andel Sudik has been performing and teaching improvisation for over 10 years. She is an alum of The Second City in Chicago and Amsterdam's Boom Chicago and loves to play at iO. Check her out on Twitter @AndelSudik or on her website www.yesandel.com.